Crying and the Personal Torturer!

I've been a PT for 31 years. In that time I've been called a lot of things. But most commonly I've been called the personal torturer or physical terrorist! It doesn't make me feel great about what I do. I know people come to see me and some of their issues are going to result in pain. When I worked with adults we used pain medicine, ice, heat and other modalities to decrease pain. Often times it isn't that effective but the exercises are necessary and folks can be reasoned with.

But babies are a totally different story. By nature babies cry. Its their only form of communication when something goes wrong in their world. Its how they tell us they're hungry or wet or tired or they just need us. It's also how they tell us that the exercise we're doing with them is HARD. It's their way of calling us Personal Torturer! (Don't you call your trainer nasty names??)

So how do I deal with crying babies??? I promise I'm not losing my hearing. I hear your baby crying during therapy. Is it as hard on me as it is on Mom??? No, but I have children of my own and at 21 and 24 years old I still have to endure their tears and it is like a stake to the heart. So I empathize with you and I don't want to cause undue stress on my client's parents.

My hope is always to have a wonderful session with a smiling baby who responds beautifully to all my handling skills. It doesn't always happen. Sometimes baby is tired or hungry. Sometimes baby is cutting teeth or brewing an ear infection or fever. Sometimes recent immunizations are causing baby to feel poorly. So many variables can affect our session but there are some things we can do.

First thing I ask... arrive on time for my session. It gives me time to ease into my planned activities. I can take time to allow your baby to wake up. I can hold your baby and gain their trust. I can sing a song or blow bubbles before getting to more unpleasant tasks like stretching, tummy time, crawling. If our time is cut short, I have to "get down to business".

Second thing... feel free to bring feedings, pacifiers, lovies and favorite toys. I'll use anything it takes to make your baby feel happy, safe and calm. We will find a way to incorporate our "therapy" activities into your baby's routine so that they don't realize they are working.

And last... trust me and your baby to determine if the crying is just a little fussing because the task is difficult or true distress. Remember, you did not bring your baby to me to practice tasks that they have already mastered. We are working on new skills. We are using weak or tight muscles. Your baby may have difficulty tolerating movement - think about how people who hate roller coasters feel when the bottom drops!! This is not a cry in pain. This is baby telling us this movement feels different than anything they've yet experienced. I guarantee once they get the hang of independent movement you will see a completely different reaction. Everybody loves independence and when we can teach your baby how to roll over or crawl on its own he will be the happiest baby ever.

As a parent, feel free to ask to comfort your baby during therapy. Often I will have a parent perform the therapy techniques if it feel like the baby is not responding well to strangers. (HINT: I always invite parents, grandparents and caregivers into my sessions. You are there to LEARN and should not be asked to leave a 0-24 months old during therapy.) Trust the process. I often tell parents that a baby may cry the first time an activity is introduced but will often willingly repeat that activity at home after the session, once they've processed it or are in their safe environment. (Feel free to text me and brag on your child later in the day. I love to get video of your baby succeeding.) You didn't learn difficult tasks in 60 minutes and your baby won't either. We're in this together and will work it out. Does the crying ever affect us less? NO but the pride of watching your child persevere and progress will help!